Potato Tales

    Translating novels one potato at a time.

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    The night deepened, and silence blanketed the world.

    In the Princess Consort’s quarters, the carved window was propped open with a slender wooden stick, allowing a gentle breeze to waft into the room, causing the palace lanterns to sway lightly.

    Xu Qingzhao sat cross-legged on a meditation cushion, her gaze deep as she stared at the brilliant starry sky. One hand propped her cheek, while the other played with a teacup, her thoughts wandering who knows where.

    Not far away, Ren Ye lay sprawled out on the floor, staring blankly at the ceiling with an utterly drained expression.

    After enduring two full hours of “soul resonance,” it wasn’t just his Heavenly Pardoned Qi that seemed depleted—he felt as if even his body hair had been siphoned away. To put it mildly, it was a miracle he was still alive.

    If the world’s men each held a portion of masculinity, Ren Ye felt he had single-handedly taken eight-tenths of it.

    Fortunately, the Princess Consort was a woman of her word. True to her promise, she demonstrated an eerie and enigmatic Daoist technique to this self-proclaimed “Yin-Yang Emperor.”

    “If you’re tired, you can sleep here for a while. With me here, no one will kill you.” The cold breeze carried Xu Qingzhao’s emotionless voice.

    A lack of emotion, in itself, could also be a form of care.

    For Xu Qingzhao, she had always been wary of entangling herself in the karma of a Heavenly Pardoned One. Yet, for reasons she couldn’t quite fathom, ever since she began trading equal exchanges for his unique fortune, she couldn’t shake the feeling that she was somehow taking advantage of him…

    On the plush woolen carpet, Ren Ye wiped the sweat from his forehead and stared wistfully at the ceiling. “Sigh, I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in over three years. What’s one more restless night…”

    “Three years?” Xu Qingzhao asked flatly, “What have you done to trouble your conscience?”

    “Nothing. Maybe it’s just that I’ve never fully adjusted. I feel wronged, resentful, regretful, and… maybe just a little resigned? Ha, maybe all of it,” Ren Ye mused, completely letting his guard down. “There’s always been this deep-seated sense of negativity weighing on my heart, never fully released.”

    Xu Qingzhao didn’t understand what he meant and didn’t particularly care to ask. She simply returned to her usual silence.

    Dong, dong-dong~!

    The quiet of the quarters was interrupted by the sound of a watchman’s gong, shattering Ren Ye’s conflicted thoughts.

    It was midnight.

    Ren Ye snapped out of his daze and suddenly sat up from the floor, grabbing his robes to dress. “My dear consort, you should rest early. I’ll be off now.”

    Xu Qingzhao paid him no mind.

    After a moment, Ren Ye finished dressing and headed for the palace door.

    “…I’ve told you before, as long as you don’t actively seek danger, I’ll do my best to keep you safe,” Xu Qingzhao said, propping her cheek on her hand and glancing his way. “But if you insist on taking action, no matter what happens, I’ll remain a bystander.”

    Though Xu Qingzhao maintained a detached and ethereal demeanor, she was well aware of the scheming and backstabbing within the prince’s estate. She knew that Ren Ye was planning to take a risk tonight, which was why she offered him this well-intentioned warning.

    “My dear consort, I forgot to mention—I’ve never been one to sit idly by…” Ren Ye smiled, leaving this remark behind as he confidently pushed open the door and departed.

    “Foolish people are beyond saving…”  

    Xu Qingzhao lightly shook her head, her expression serene as she turned her gaze back toward the window.

    A quarter-hour later, in Prince Huai’s quarters.

    Ren Ye sat upright in a chair, issuing orders. “Carry out the plan we discussed yesterday. Go to the Pleasure Garden and select the songstresses. Make sure to mix that female traitor into the group and bring them here. If she resists, subdue her, but remember—leave her alive.”

    “Understood.” Second Fool accepted the command and promptly left with a group of eunuchs.

    Ren Ye then turned to Lian’er, who stood pale-faced within the hall, and gestured for her to prepare. “Head to the Palace of Joy early and do as I instructed.”

    Within the dimly lit hall, the flickering candlelight reflected Lian’er’s ashen face. Fear flickered in her wide eyes as she looked at Ren Ye.

    Curious, Ren Ye asked, “What’s wrong? Why do you look like you’ve seen a ghost?”

    “…I… I won’t lie to Your Highness. I really do feel like I’ve seen a ghost,” Lian’er stammered, forcing herself to speak. “I don’t know why, but ever since you returned from the Princess Consort’s quarters, there’s been this eerie aura about you. It’s as if…”

    “As if what? Speak freely.”

    “As if I’m seeing a dead person—or one of those wandering Daoists who roam the wilds, summoning spirits and exorcising ghosts. There’s just such a heavy air of death about you,” Lian’er confessed earnestly. “You… you wouldn’t have…?”

    “It’s nothing,” Ren Ye interrupted with a wave of his hand. “Every time I return from the Princess Consort’s place, I’m drained… but today, I’m especially drained. I’ll be fine by tomorrow.”

    “Shall I go prepare now?”

    “Go!” Ren Ye nodded in approval.

    Midnight passed. In the Pleasure Garden.

    The eunuch in charge of the ceremonial hall called out in his shrill voice, “By order of His Highness, those chosen will proceed to the Palace of Joy to serve!”

    The sound of a gong rang out, and the little eunuchs within the courtyard bustled into action. Before long, the songstresses and maidservants of the Pleasure Garden gathered in the outer courtyard, standing in neat rows.

    “Guard Hong, proceed!” The elderly eunuch raised his arm and gestured impatiently to Second Fool.

    Second Fool nodded slightly in response and walked briskly into the lineup of courtesans, beginning to make his selections.

    Under the night sky, with the lamps swaying gently, Liu Ling’er stood hidden among the courtesans, her eyes fixed on Second Fool. She concentrated, once again sensing the subtle connection between them.

    His loyalty, unwavering and dog-like, remained stable and showed no signs of deviation.

    After selecting more than ten women, Second Fool came to Liu Ling’er. His gaze lingered on her enchanting figure, filled with an uncontrollable fervor.

    “This servant has her monthly flow and may not be suitable to serve His Highness,” Liu Ling’er curtsied gracefully while subtly signaling Second Fool with her eyes.

    “Then what use are you?!”  

    Second Fool reprimanded her, following her gaze toward another courtesan skilled at playing the sheng and asked, “Are you in the same situation?”

    The woman blushed shyly and shook her head.

    “Then step forward,” Second Fool said, marking her before hastily moving past Liu Ling’er without a second glance.

    Half an hour later, more than twenty courtesans proficient in musical performance were brought to the Palace of Joy.

    Sitting grandly in the hall, with the scent of alcohol thick in the air, Ren Ye drunkenly shouted, “This prince is in a foul mood! Play music and dance for me! If you please me, there will be great rewards!”

    With his loud proclamation, the beautiful courtesans got to work. Before long, the hall was filled with harmonious music and elegant dances.

    Ren Ye, holding a goblet of fine wine, feigned the demeanor of a dissolute aristocrat, his eyes roaming over the courtesans’ alluring figures. However, his mind was elsewhere.

    “Second Fool!”

    “Your servant is here.”

    “Have you identified which one is the traitor?” Ren Ye’s eyes scrutinized the women in the hall as he softly inquired.

    Second Fool leaned in slightly, covering his mouth with one hand. “The woman playing the sheng on the left is the one who fought me at Spring Fragrance Garden.”

    “You’re certain?” Ren Ye turned to stare at Second Fool, his gaze sharp.

    “Your servant is certain—it is her.”

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    “Later, I’ll summon her to my quarters. Go prepare in the bedroom,” Ren Ye instructed after a moment of thought. “But take care not to reveal anything prematurely. She is highly skilled in martial arts and lightness techniques. We cannot let her escape.”

    “Rest assured, Your Highness, I will capture her alive,” Second Fool replied before quietly leaving the hall.

    “Hahaha!”  

    Ren Ye burst into laughter, raising his goblet unsteadily as he bellowed, “Keep playing! Keep dancing!”

    From the right side of the hall, Lian’er, standing among the attendants, exchanged a meaningful glance with another maid before stepping away.

    Once Second Fool exited the Palace of Joy, the ingratiating expression on his face vanished.

    He first made a stop at the Prince Huai quarters, deliberately sending away the eunuch on night duty before leaving stealthily.

    Moments later, he arrived at the Hall of Tranquility with a woman disguised as a servant.

    As they appeared, two eunuchs emerged from the corridor. One of them called out, “Who goes there?”

    “It’s me,” Second Fool replied curtly as he climbed the steps and gestured to the servant beside him. “His Highness is drinking and reveling in the Palace of Joy. He specifically sent us to retrieve some personal items.”

    “Ah, it’s Lord Hong. Please, please!”  

    “Lord Hong, I’ve never seen this maid before,” one eunuch remarked.

    “She’s from the Pleasure Garden. Don’t ask too many questions,” Second Fool retorted coldly.

    “Understood, understood,” the eunuchs replied with fawning smiles, stepping aside to make way.

    “You two don’t need to follow. Stay alert on your watch,” Second Fool commanded.

    “Yes, sir.”

    After a brief exchange at the entrance, Second Fool led the servant into the hall.

    The eunuchs guarding the Hall of Tranquility were all prearranged by him and Lian’er. Knowing the precise positions of each night watchman, Second Fool encountered no other obstacles along the way.

    In the dim corridor, the seemingly ordinary maid following closely behind him slowly lifted her head. “Has that fool noticed anything unusual about the courtesan?”

    “Reporting to you, master, the fool plans to lure the courtesan into the bedchamber and have me subdue her,” Second Fool replied, his gaze fiery as he constantly licked his parched lips while addressing Liu Ling’er, who was disguised as the servant. “The eunuchs in the hall are all utterly useless, unarmed and untrained. He won’t dare act rashly at this point.”

    “Good,” Liu Ling’er said with a satisfied nod. “Are you sure you can access the mechanisms in the secret chamber?”

    Second Fool responded respectfully, “The Nation-Stabilizing Sword previously placed in the hall serves as the switch to the secret chamber. However, it recognized a new owner a few days ago. That fool secretly swapped the real sword with a counterfeit of identical appearance, which still presses the mechanism. Anyone who knows the intricacies can access it, so there’s no need for concern.”

    Liu Ling’er nodded with satisfaction. “Let’s move faster.”

    The time remaining until the task deadline was less than seven hours. Liu Ling’er was anxious, determined to complete the mission swiftly to avoid any complications.

    The two hurried along in tandem, quickly arriving at the main hall.

    Creak!

    The hall doors closed behind them. Standing in the darkness, Liu Ling’er surveyed her surroundings cautiously, her eyes gleaming with vigilance.

    Second Fool stepped forward, bypassing the towering throne. He reached out and lifted the fake Nation-Stabilizing Sword.

    Click!

    With a grinding of gears, a section of the wall split open, revealing a hidden passage.

    “This is the secret chamber that waste discovered,” Second Fool exclaimed excitedly, looking at Liu Ling’er as though presenting a treasure. His voice trembled with passion. “Master! After this is over, I only ask for the chance to… indulge with you just one more time. Even if I were to die immediately afterward, I would have no regrets!”

    Liu Ling’er cast him a cold glance. “You go first.”

    “Understood!” Second Fool wasted no time and darted into the passage.

    Closing her eyes, Liu Ling’er carefully used her spiritual senses to evaluate the subtle connection between herself and Second Fool. Confirming that his devoted thrall state remained stable, she nodded in approval.

    Within moments, Second Fool’s voice echoed up from the passageway. “Master, there’s nothing unusual here.”

    Liu Ling’er furrowed her brows and softly called out, “Spring Breeze Delight.”

    Whoosh!

    A flash of light illuminated the scene as a scroll artifact materialized in Liu Ling’er’s hand.

    Gripping the treasure tightly, she held her breath and stepped cautiously into the passage. 

    Dim firelight flickered uneasily, casting dancing shadows on the walls. As Liu Ling’er’s eyes adjusted to the gloom, the full scope of the secret chamber came into view. Simultaneously, the notification chime of the Stellar Scar Gate rang in her ears.

    [Congratulations, enchanting songstress. You have discovered a hidden passage within the prince’s manor. Mission progress: 1/3.]

    Hearing this, Liu Ling’er felt a surge of joy. Accepting the torch passed to her by Second Fool, she turned to examine the densely packed shelves within the chamber. “When you and that waste came to this secret chamber, did you find any architectural plans for the princess’s tomb from the previous dynasty?”

    “No, I didn’t find anything like that,” Second Fool replied, shaking his head.

    Looking further ahead, Liu Ling’er noticed a heavy iron door at the far end of the chamber, her expression piqued with curiosity. “Where does this lead?”

    “I don’t know. But that day, when the waste Prince Huai and I were here, we encountered a malevolent spirit…!” Second Fool vividly recounted the events of that day.

    After listening, Liu Ling’er cautiously approached the iron door. Investigating the chamber’s secrets was part of her mission, and she couldn’t resist the temptation to explore further.

    “Master,” Second Fool said in a low voice as he watched the flickering flames. “I’ve been away for nearly half an hour. I must return to the Palace of Joy to report back, or that waste might grow suspicious…!”

    “Go,” Liu Ling’er said lightly. “Leave the chamber door open. Once I’ve finished investigating, I’ll find a side room to hide in. You can come pick me up later.”

    “Yes!” Second Fool cupped his fists but paused to ask, “Once the flutist songstress is brought into the sleeping quarters, how should I handle her? If the waste Prince Huai speaks to her, the truth will surely come out.”

    “Tell him that the woman is a formidable martial artist with mysterious supernatural abilities. Convince him to hide somewhere safe,” Liu Ling’er said calmly, observing the iron door. Her voice was clear and decisive. “After he leaves, pretend to accidentally kill the songstress. With no witness, the matter will be settled.”

    “The two eunuchs at the hall entrance saw us earlier…”

    “Kill them before you leave,” Liu Ling’er said with a cold smile. “I have my ways to divert attention.”

    “Understood!” Second Fool replied and quickly left the secret chamber.

    In the Hall of Tranquility, the dark, narrow corridor echoed with the sound of hurried footsteps as Second Fool made his way back to the Palace of Joy.

    The surroundings were silent, broken only by the rapid tapping of his boots against the floor…

    “Second Fool!”

    A familiar voice rang out suddenly. “What’s so special about that woman? Isn’t Lian’er good enough?!”

    The words struck Second Fool like a bolt of ice. His neck tingled with a chill as he reflexively drew his blade, Inviting Moon.

    The flickering firelight revealed the figure of Ren Ye.

    Upon seeing him, Second Fool’s pupils contracted. His expression hardened as he shouted obstinately, “You waste! No one is allowed to harm my master!”

    “Smack!”

    Lian’er, hidden to the left, stepped forward and slapped him across the face. “What’s wrong with me?! You switch loyalties faster than the prince strips his clothes!”

    As she scolded him, she slapped a delicate talisman onto Second Fool’s chest.

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