Potato Tales

    Translating novels one potato at a time.

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    “Mr. Gu, do you think Sister Hu and Teacher Li were a good match?” Wang Sheng asked curiously.

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    Gu Ning’an smiled and replied, “It’s hard to say. Whether they’re suitable or not is up to them.”

    “Oh, Wang Sheng, what a pointless question!”

    “Sister Hu seems like a good-natured person, but the size difference between her and Teacher Li is just too much. Of course, they’re not a good match,” Tang Zi interjected.

    Nearby, Sun De nodded sagely and added, “Confucius said, ‘When paths differ, they’re not a match.’ Those two clearly aren’t on the same wavelength.”

    Hearing this, Gu Ning’an couldn’t help but rub Sun De’s head. “Is that really what Confucius said?”

    “Isn’t it?” Sun De tilted his head in confusion.

    Gu Ning’an chuckled. “Alright, stop misquoting Confucius. If he heard you, he’d crawl out of his coffin to lecture you.”

    “Mr. Gu, you’re wrong about that!”

    “Confucius did not speak of ghosts, monsters, or spirits!”

    “Even if Confucius died, he wouldn’t become some ghost or monster!” Sun De declared with utter seriousness.

    This kid… Gu Ning’an chose to ignore him and instead turned his gaze toward the kitchen door.

    From the sound of footsteps, someone was coming back—two people, in fact.

    “Please, come inside!” Li Fangchang’s voice drifted over.

    Moments later, a young woman walked in. She was neither fat nor thin, dressed in a floral dress, and had an overall pleasant appearance.

    Seeing so many people inside the kitchen, the woman jumped in surprise. “Goodness gracious! Why are there so many people in here?”

    At her exclamation, the three children instantly scurried to Gu Ning’an’s side, looking at her with nervous expressions.

    Gu Ning’an patted each of their backs in turn and nodded at the woman with the coarse voice, acknowledging her arrival.

    Soon after, Li Fangchang, who had taken off his rain cloak, entered the room and glanced between the two groups before offering an introduction.

    It turned out that just as he had seen Miss Wu off, this Miss Song had arrived.

    Miss Song was also introduced by Li Fangchang’s aunt. Since she showed up, Li Fangchang had naturally invited her in.

    Regardless of whether he wanted to meet her or whether they would hit it off, he was at least polite enough to meet her, have a conversation, and see where things went.

    After serving Miss Song a cup of tea, but before he could say anything, she spoke up in her rough voice: “Do you have any alcohol? Tea is so boring.”

    “Alcohol… I don’t usually drink, so I don’t have any here…” Li Fangchang replied awkwardly.

    “A man who doesn’t drink?” Miss Song pursed her lips and yawned, paying no mind to her image. “Tell me, what do you usually do for fun?”

    “Me? I like reading… things like The Analects, Zhuangzi, Mencius, and Laozi…”

    Miss Song raised her hand. “Laozi? There’s actually a book called that?” [Laozi means Old Master or Old Man]

    “Um… It’s by someone named Laozi,” Li Fangchang explained.

    “Goodness gracious! What kind of person is so bold as to call themselves Laozi?” As she spoke, Miss Song picked up her teacup and downed its contents in one gulp.

    “Ah!”

    “This tea is nothing compared to alcohol.”

    Wiping the tea from the corner of her mouth, Miss Song slammed the cup down with a loud clack, laughing heartily. “Alright, alright! Tell me, what’s in this Laozi’s book?”

    “Okay, okay!” Li Fangchang nodded repeatedly, cleared his throat, and began: “This book, also called the Tao Te Ching, says…

    ‘The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao.

    The name that can be named is not the eternal name…

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    The nameless is the origin of Heaven and Earth…’”

    “Stop!” Miss Song raised a hand impatiently. “So all you read are things like that?”

    Li Fangchang nodded. “Yes…”

    “Alright, we’re not suitable for each other. I’m leaving now, okay?” Miss Song was a decisive person. As she spoke, she was already at the door, picking up the oil-paper umbrella she had brought.

    Li Fangzhang hurriedly got up. “Let me walk you out!”

    “Stay here! Stay here!” Miss Song pushed Li Fangzhang’s shoulder, clasped her hands in a polite gesture, and smiled at everyone present. “Farewell, everyone! Until we meet again!”

    With that, she turned and disappeared into the rain, leaving behind a dazed Li Fangzhang standing in the wind, utterly disoriented.

    After a moment, the three children gathered around Gu Ning’an. With a subtle signal from him, they went over to comfort Li Fangzhang.

    Tang Zi said, “Teacher Li, don’t feel bad. Matters between men and women can’t be forced. She didn’t like you, and you didn’t like her either, right?”

    Wang Sheng added, “I think Little Zi is right!”

    Sun De chimed in, “Confucius said, ‘If first doesn’t work out, and the second don’t work out, then the third must succeed!’”

    Hearing this, Li Fangzhang forced a bitter smile. “You three little rascals are actually comforting me now?”

    “Don’t worry about me, kids. I’m not upset; I just feel… confused.”

    Not far away, Gu Ning’an chuckled and said, “Didn’t you say there were three? The third one should be arriving soon. Why don’t you think about what to say when she gets here?”

    “Right, right, Mr. Gu is right!” Li Fangzhang slapped his forehead and shooed the children away. He began pacing back and forth, deep in thought.

    After a moment, he suddenly stopped and said with a puzzled expression, “Wait a minute, I’m still preparing for the provincial exams. I’ve never even thought about starting a family!”

    “My aunt’s move really caught me off guard… I’m completely thrown off by this!”

    “When the third young lady arrives, I must be honest about my feelings!”

    “I’ll say it directly: ‘Miss, I’m sorry, but I need to focus on establishing my career before starting a family…'”

    As Li Fangzhang was speaking passionately, a graceful figure appeared at the kitchen door. Gu Ning’an noticed her and pointed toward the door, signaling with a glance.

    Catching the hint, Li Fangzhang immediately stopped talking. He turned around slowly, and when he saw the young woman at the door, he froze, stunned.

    At the door stood a young lady wearing an orange and blue tasseled dress. Intricate lotus flower patterns adorned the hem, and a silky sash around her waist complemented her outfit perfectly, highlighting her slender and graceful figure.

    Judging by Li Fangzhang’s transfixed expression, it was clear the young woman was stunningly beautiful.

    The charming woman noticed his reaction, covered her mouth to stifle a laugh, and waved a hand in front of his face.

    Caught off guard by the faint fragrance of her perfume, Li Fangzhang quickly gestured for her to come in. “Miss, please come inside!”

    The charming young woman responded with a slight bow and a smile, her cheeks dimpling with two shallow dimples.

    Once again, Li Fangzhang brewed a cup of tea. Sitting opposite the beautiful young woman, he began chatting eagerly.

    “Men will always be men. When they see someone pretty, they can’t move on. Teacher Li is no exception!” Tang Zi grumbled indignantly. “That whole ‘career first, then family’ thing was just an excuse!”

    She suddenly noticed the peculiar and unreadable expression on Gu Ning’an’s face and asked curiously, “Mr. Gu, what’s wrong?”

    “This sister is really pretty, isn’t she? Did you fall for her too?”

    This one is indeed beautiful, but I don’t think ‘sister’ is the right term for her… Gu Ning’an shook his head. “Don’t worry. I won’t compete with your teacher.”

    “That’s good. You’re more handsome than my teacher. If you did compete, he’d definitely lose.” Tang Zi sighed in relief.

    Gu Ning’an pinched her chubby cheeks and smiled. “You’re really protective of your teacher, aren’t you?”

    “Of course! No matter how bad he is, he’s still our teacher!” Tang Zi replied with a cheerful grin.

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