Potato Tales

    Translating novels one potato at a time.

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    In a secluded and secret meditation chamber, the lighting was dim and mottled.

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    At the center of the chamber, the Flood Dragon Emperor sat cross-legged, his posture upright, and his sword-like brows occasionally furrowed.

    Surrounding him, a strange and mysterious halo rotated slowly. All manner of bizarre illusions floated up like ephemeral dreams, changing from moment to moment.

    From ants struggling to survive to the stars spinning through the cosmos, it seemed as though everything in existence was encompassed within that halo.

    Precisely because of this, the Flood Dragon Emperor had no choice but to go into seclusion, trying to dispel the illusions.

    The chamber had no doors and was located deep within the Demon Emperor’s Palace. In the current state of the hollowed-out Demon Capital, anyone could theoretically sneak in. By all logic, the Flood Dragon Emperor should have been extremely weak right now, utterly unresponsive to the outside world due to being consumed by the illusions.

    Yet only Liu Shi knew: even though the Flood Dragon Emperor was currently immobile, no one beneath the level of a great demon could harm him.

    Just the illusion spell that True Immortal Ling Xuan had cast upon him—anyone who approached would fall into the illusion and be lost forever.

    Seeing that the Flood Dragon Emperor still showed no signs of waking—just like he had when entering seclusion ten years ago—Liu Shi sighed helplessly.

    At this moment, she had shed her imposing demeanor as the Regent Emperor and once again appeared like the maidservant who had once followed by the Flood Dragon Emperor’s side.

    Sitting outside the chamber, propping her cheek with one hand, she sighed and muttered, “Flood Dragon Emperor, just when are you going to wake up…?”

    “Didn’t you say it would be a few years? It’s already been ten! Why are you still the same as before?”

    “If I’d known it would take this long, you could’ve at least left me some protective artifacts… My strength isn’t enough. If I hadn’t lied about being able to contact you, I wouldn’t have been able to keep the demon generals under control…”

    “I really don’t know what you were thinking… actually choosing me to act as Regent Emperor…”

    “After finally gaining my freedom, all I wanted was to quietly live as a maid again…”

    At this point, Liu Shi furrowed her brow, her expression turning disgusted. “That tiger demon Lei Zhen, and that snake demon You Ying—they’ve lived for hundreds of years and are both decently strong, yet they’re completely ignorant of the wider world.”

    “I’ve told them again and again about rules, about reason—don’t provoke Mr. Gu, don’t provoke Mr. Gu!”

    “But those two idiots just wouldn’t listen, thinking I’m just being cowardly… Is that cowardice?”

    “That’s knowing how to assess the situation! Wouldn’t you agree, Flood Dragon Emperor?”

    “Of course, I absolutely didn’t tell them that even you weren’t a match for Mr. Gu… They still think Mr. Gu only fights you evenly, that he’s just some ordinary True Immortal…”

    Smack!

    Liu Shi slapped her thigh and growled, “Sometimes I just wish Mr. Gu would pop out and slap those two idiots to death!”

    After her rambling complaints, Liu Shi stood back up, her expression bitter. “Flood Dragon Emperor, I’m leaving now. I’ve done my best to handle all the matters you entrusted to me.”

    “The business of preying on innocent people only started recently. I gave those two fools a hundred soul lashes—hopefully, they’ve learned something and will stop stirring up trouble…”

    “Your humble servant takes her leave now. Please wake up soon. Sitting in that position… I haven’t had a single moment of peace…”

    In a classically decorated tavern hall, lanterns glowed softly, casting warm light across the space as if it were daylight.

    On the table were all kinds of exquisite dishes and fine wines, their aromas mouthwatering.

    In the air, beyond the fragrance of food and wine, there was the soft sound of music. Looking over, one would see several elegantly dressed musicians gently plucking their instruments.

    In this large hall, there were only two tables of guests, many of whom were demon generals of the Great Tong Dynasty and their trusted aides.

    At the center of the gathering, surrounded like stars around the moon, sat Lei Zhen and You Ying.

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    Just a few hours ago, the two had received a hundred soul lashes. Their faces were still pale, but judging by their ability to still feast and drink, it seemed the demon soldiers doing the whipping hadn’t dared to go all out…

    Crash!

    Lei Zhen suddenly hurled his jade cup to the ground. Wine and shards flew everywhere.

    The lively atmosphere of the tavern instantly fell silent at the sharp sound. Everyone turned toward Lei Zhen.

    He clutched his head, his expression twisted with pain. Bulging veins writhed like coiled dragons along his arms, neck, and forehead.

    “Wretched maid!”

    “Damn it!”

    The searing pain that radiated from his very soul made Lei Zhen feel like cracking his own skull open. His bloodshot eyes brimmed with murderous intent.

    Such was the expected aftereffect of the Soul Whip—a torment that shredded the soul and could not be dulled in just forty-five minutes.

    “Heh… heh heh heh!” With a shadowy gaze, You Ying let out a string of mad laughter. It was clear to everyone that he too was suffering the effects of soul damage.

    Otherwise, he wouldn’t be repeatedly stabbing a dagger into his own palm, using pain to distract from the agony in his spirit.

    After a while, the two seemed to improve a little. Both lifted their heads, panting heavily.

    “Say…” Lei Zhen narrowed his eyes, scanning the room as he asked in a deep voice, “The Flood Dragon Emperor hasn’t emerged for ten years. Just how badly was he wounded in his final battle with True Immortal Ling Xuan?”

    No one dared respond—this was a great demon they were talking about. No one wanted their gossip to reach the ears of the Flood Dragon Emperor himself…

    “Lei Zhen…” You Ying smirked playfully. “Are you trying to say the Flood Dragon Emperor might already be dead?”

    Clatter!

    You Ying’s words made the assembled demons widen their eyes in alarm. Some looked ready to flee the banquet altogether.

    Criticizing the Regent Emperor was one thing—but slandering the Flood Dragon Emperor was another matter entirely!

    “Only you truly understand me, Brother You Ying!” Lei Zhen’s eyes flashed fiercely as he stood and looked around. “If the Flood Dragon Emperor is dead, then why should we still be trampled by that wretched maid?!”

    “General Lei, be careful what you say!” a fat pig demon quickly interjected. “We cannot speak lightly of a being in the great demon realm!”

    “Just saying his name can elicit a reaction…”

    “Oh?” Lei Zhen stepped away from his seat and walked over to the pig demon, smiling as he patted him on the shoulder. “Thanks for the reminder.”

    The pig demon trembled and looked up. “General Lei, I only meant—”

    Rip!

    Blood sprayed into the air!

    In the blink of an eye, Lei Zhen’s head had transformed into that of a tiger. With a single bite, he tore off the pig demon’s head and swallowed it whole.

    Crunch—crunch—

    The sound of skull fragments cracking echoed through the tavern. With his tiger head and human body, Lei Zhen chewed as he spoke with a mouth full, “Mm, pig head really hits the spot. Anyone else want a taste?”

    For a moment, the whole room fell deathly silent. No one dared utter a word. Everyone knew Lei Zhen had the highest cultivation among the demon generals. Now that he had gone feral, no one was foolish enough to provoke him.

    Spit!

    He spat out a mouthful of blood, returned to his human form, and said coldly, “The Flood Dragon Emperor? That worthless mudfish—if he were still alive, how could he possibly not show himself?”

    “That bastard must’ve perished alongside that old man Ling Xuan!”

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